Friday, January 3, 2014

We all started somewhere..

Its 2014!!


Promises of healthier lifestyles, more time spent at the gym, and weight loss crowd social media sites.
Was that one of your goals, resolutions, or promises to yourself or your family this year?

It is mine!

This is the first year of my life that I have, as a resolution to myself and those in my life, promised to take real charge and make some real changes for my health and my body -- and I know I'm actually going to do something about it!

I started my most recent weight loss journey mid-January of 2013 for two main reasons:
  1) I wanted to look better and fell better about myself - FOR ME
  2) I wanted to look sexy/desirable; Be the girl with brains, personality, AND a body!

I know what you're thinking right now-- WHY IN THE HECK WOULD YOU DIET FOR A BOY?! Well, I guess we could probably argue about that all day... but in the end... its honestly what I wanted... and knowing that I would be sexier and healthier and all around "the package" for him (and myself too!!) -- then well, it was excellent motivation to do what I had already wanted but, honestly, was too afraid to get off of my butt and do something to change it.

I started taking Phentermine, a diet-suppressant energy pill (approved by the FDA) and loved it. It curbed my appetite and therefore, I ate less. Less doesn't always mean better. Sure, for the first couple weeks or even months I ate right. Mostly clean eating, but It was in such small portions that it didn't really matter. Phentermine took away my appetite. On an average day I would wake up, not eat breakfast (BAD!), skip lunch (BAD!), fiber bar (140 calories), and a light dinner (200-400 calories - BAD!). For my body, I need around 1,000 - 1,200 calories per day to "diet" and still have energy and ability to workout and build muscle. I also rarely ever drank anything -- including water (MISTAKE!)

I also went to the gym 3-4 days a week. When I went to the gym I would do about 30-60 minutes of cardio which was mainly walking and/or lightly jogging. Occasionally I would use the elliptical there too, since I felt to notice I burned more calories on that machine. I never challenged myself. I never really "stuck it out" for those fat-burning workouts. All I wanted to do was burn calories and burn them fast. (Burn more calories than you take in = basic weight loss.) I never lifted weights. I never knew how, and I always made excuses not to learn *insert lame excuse here like: trainers are expensive or that I have no time*

Sure, I was losing weight and some inches too! I felt better about myself  -- I mean, who wouldn't feel good about themselves being a size 8 and weighing 145, when I had reached a height of size 18 and a weight of 210 in my past! (and yes.. that is without having babies --- pure fat and being unhealthy from snacking, eating unhealthy foods in rather large amounts and frequently, and lacking basically all exercise...)

However, I realize now that I was losing inches and pounds, but I wasn't getting stronger.
I was only getting skinnier.
I couldn't run any miles.
I couldn't lift any real weights.
I would get exhausted so easily.
I wasn't getting skinny ---- I was getting SKINNY FAT.
A person who is not overweight and looks skinny but still has a high fat percentage and low muscular mass. Usually those people have a low caloric diet (check!), that's why they are skinny, but are not involved in any sports activities or trainings (check again!) and that's why they don’t have much muscle.

Skinny fat woman look great from a certain distance or in clothes, but might not look good naked (check again....) and probably have some cellulite even if they are young.
(Oooookay now seriously. Is this a definition of "skinny fat" or of me?!?!)
I don't want to be fat, and I definitely don't want to be "skinny fat" anymore. I don't really even care about being technically "skinny" anymore. I want to be genuinely and honestly more healthy and more fit. I want to be stronger. I want to put good things into my body and I want to work hard to change it. I want to see a difference in my definition, not the number on the scale.
This year, I am promising myself a real change.
I'm promising to actually eat, and to eat healthy. I can do this!
I'm promising myself that I can do this without the help of weight loss medication.
I'm promising myself to change my body with exercise.
I'm promising myself to do this for no one else other than myself.
I've already started eating right. Today I've had some protein for breakfast and I plan on protein and vegetables for lunch. Dinner... who knows.... probably salmon and some baked veggies! Not to mention the 75oz of water that I've already had today -- and its only 3:30pm!
I also started BOOTCAMP. It's a ladies only fitness center where you have small-group classes and work to reduce fat, build muscle, build endurance, and have a wonderful place to workout with women who are working towards transforming their bodies too -- the right way! Talk about some real motivation and some serious soreness! EEK! My second "official" class is tonight.
I'm sore. I'm tired. I kiiindof want to skip it -- BUT I WONT!!
Anyways... all that to say... this New Year...
Stop complaining about how "overcrowded" the gym is.
Stop rolling your eyes when people tell you that their resolution/goal/promise for 2014 is to get healthy or lose weight.
Stop making fun of the "fat girl/guy" in class -- and realize: