....UNTIL NOW (-ish)

I've said it before and I will say it again. I've always been.....

 

*insert evil music here*

 

THAT GIRL.

You know the one... the girl with a pretty face and a sweet/nice/great personality. (HA!)

UNTIL NOW(-ish).

 

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I've never really had a great self esteem... like ever.

When I was a little girl I used to worry that I was fat -- which I totally wasn't.

When I was in Jr. High I didnt look like the other girls. I was getting heavy and I absolutely noticed. I was in a size 12 jeans by the 7th grade. Other girls had "boyfriends" and all that I had were boys that were good friends.

In high school I was friends with everyone --  a "vanilla kid" as my cousin calls it -- but I didn't have boyfriends. I didnt have many real friends or a clique either. I felt like it was just me... alone in a stupid "if youre not somebody... you're a nobody -- an outsider" school full of cheerleaders, athletes, skinny people, and those people that I would never look like. And then there was me... sitting alone with the guys with my camo pants on, my baggy tshirt, my loooooong pin-straight hair (not kidding. I could literally sit on it) and my love for science. I was smart --- and thats all that I had going for me as far as high school rules go -- and even that wasn't "cool."

(this wasn't even at its longest....)

I got to college and stopped caring what people thought, because people were so accepting of me. They didnt care, and why should I? I ate what I wanted and did what I wanted. No one really ever called me "pretty" and I knew I wasnt one of the skinny girls or the athletes --- but that was okay. I put my weight and my self-image on the backburner and did what I wanted. I had fun, instead of worrying about being unhealthy or the fat girl of the group.

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It wasn't until I started losing weight that I realized where I really was.. and how far I had come. Nothing really changed at first.
The first 20 pounds came off and some peope noticed -- and some didnt.

It took losing 28 or 29 pounds total for people to really start noticing. At that point, I was basically down to a size 8 from a size 14 -- my body had really changed.

I went to an old friends wedding and she couldnt believe I had lost so much weight.

Then friends started making comments about what I was eating.
We went over to some friends of ours house and they made (in addition to what THEY wanted, I might add) turkey burgers.... just for me... because they knew I was watching my weight.

Then I would go back to RSU for board meetings or sorority meetings and everyone would say "wow Paula, you look incredible."

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Lately, things have even gotten more REAL for me... as far as realization for what I have done and how far I have come is concerned.

The other night, I wanted to go dancing. I bought my very first pair of boots and I bought a dress (on sale!!) form JCP. I curled my hair and went out with friends and my boyfriend.

I FELT PRETTY

 

For the first time in a long time in foreverrrrrr I felt -- not like THAT girl --- but like the pretty girl in the room. I showed my boyfriend my outfit before I left and his eyes widened (even though I thought he might think I looked silly). He looked at me and at that moment I felt, finally, like the smart AND skinny AND funny AND beautiful woman (and girlfriend) that I always wanted to be.

I felt GOOD.

 

We got to Caravan to do some drinking/dancing when an old guy friend of mine walked up and said "HI" to everyone. He talked about his new job and how things have changed...

 

......it took him about 4 minutes into talking to stop - mid sentence - and say OH MY GOOOOOOOD I DIDNT EVEN RECOGNIZE YOUUUUU!!! and then continued to let his mouth hang open and repeat the previous sentence more times that I want to remember. Well, thats a lie --- I want to remember (and replay in my mind...over and over...and over) him repeating that silly little sentence with his wide eyes and gaping jaw.

 

All I could think was HEY!! ITS ME....PAULA! SURPRISE! haha

All I could do was laugh (and BLUSHH!) and thank him for being so kind.

 

It wasnt just him being KIND, It was him being TOTALLY, COMPLETELY, and ABSOLUTELY HONEST AND REAL. His reaction to my physical changes weren't fake or planned... it was GENUINE, and that made such a HUGE impact on me.

 

I know I FEEEEEEL like a different person..... but now, I know I LOOOOOK like a different person too.

 

And it feels FANTASTIC!

...talk about a self-esteem booster!

 

I never did have ok/good/positive self esteem.......

 

UNTIL NOW!

Time to rock my entirely new self and keep on keeping on with my journey! 

 

My first fitness investment -- Motivation in the form of a HRM watch

So I see photos ALL THE TIME of friends and people I follow on social media with their special workout watches. I've never really understood the point --- nor did I want to fork up $100 - $200+
to buy one, especially when the treadmill or elliptical would tell me my calories burned as long as I entered in my age/weight and used the HRM (heart rate monitor) sensors.

That's enough.................right?

Well, maybe, if you're not concerned with calories burned and getting the most out of your workout. For me, I am focusing not on losing weight and burning normal calories--- but rather, burning FAT calories. Little did I know that your HR makes a BIG difference on what kind of workout you get and where the calories that you burn are coming from.

To lose weight in the past, I would jump on the treadmill and jog/run for a certain amount of time or miles -- without concern to my HR. After talking to a few trainers and doing my research online, I realize that working out at a certain HR can give more results and help towards whatever your goals are -- whether it is trying to lose pounds (high HR for burning more calories) or lose fat (lower HR for burning more calories from fat).

I started looking at HRMs that I had seen from other people I know or follow a few weeks ago. Most people either had a polar fitness watch or a garmin watch. Both were watches, and both came with chest straps. I didn't even know where to start, what to look for, etc. This was a first for me in the fitness world --- so off I went!

For me, since I'm not a crazy hardcore athlete -- I decided that the most important things in a HRM watch  that I needed were:

1. Ability to accurately track my heart rate
2. Ability to show calories burned (specifically, those burned from fat!)
3. Ability to show/keep time (its a watch, duh!)

Simple, right? I didn't need anything fancy or with crazy extra features.

So, after deciding my needs as a consumer, I went where I know best to research --- online! I read information about watches, HRMs, whats best -- whats worst, average costs, reviews, etc. until I worked it down to three main watches of which two, coincidentally, happened to be the same two that I had seen many friends and people that I follow wear.  The two were the FT4 ($65) polar watch and the pink/grey garmin ($190). The other being a polar upgrade -- the FT40 ($102).

I did more research, comparing, reading reviews and asking people that had them what they thought. I came down to a couple conclusions:

1. I wanted to be able to get the watch/HRM wet, in case I ever forgot to take it off or wanted to count calories from swimming
2. I didn't want to spend a small fortune on a HRM
3. I shouldn't pick a HRM based on which color I love the most

After realizing these few things, the Garmin HRM was OUT and I was left to the two polar watches. Again, I went back and compared the two.

http://heart-rate-monitors.findthebest.com/compare/23-58/Polar-FT4-vs-Polar-FT40

Both had what the basics of what I needed, but the FT40 had a few extras -- like the ability to use it in water, it had a fitness test and a training mode, it shows % fat burned, minimum and max HR, and even holds your data weekly!

So, I got on amazon (I have a prime account -- good prices, free 2 day shipping and only $3.99 for next day, an excellent return policy, etc.) and bought my FT40 in white (fyi: they come in LOTS of other colors) for $102. I paid for next day shipping because I was ready to get started!

I set up the watch the evening it came in the mail -- SUPER SIMPLE, basically like any watch you had to set date and time, as well as set your age, weight, etc. BOOM - DONE!

Using the HRM strap/sensor was suuuuuuper simple -- you just clip on a sensor to an adjustable strap that goes just under your chest -- and then put the strap on. The watch is automatically connected to the HR sensor -- so there isn't any work in getting things "configured." The data just goes wirelessly from the sensor connected to the strap around your lower chest to the watch. MAGIC.

I used the HRM the first night for a brief 20 minute jog but didn't really use it other than to monitor my HR.

Last night I went to the gym with a friend and really got some use out of it. I worked out for 35 minutes --- a warm up on the treadmill and I hit the elliptical hard (I love those things because I burn like double the calories in the same time as I would on a treadmill I feel like... not to mention the whole "less impact on your body" thing). Anyways, I ended up getting my HR very high and then working to raise my resistance, lower my speed, and eventually got to an area where I was burning more fat and was more within a zone that would, as I was trying, to burn more calories from fat. I ended up burning 437 calories total. It was a great workout and I am excited to learn more about the watch.

A couple IMPORTANT things that Ive noticed about the watch:

1. It makes me more aware of where my HR is and then I can make changes to get my HR where I want it to be to achieve that workouts goals.
2. Its motivating! Getting on a machine is so much more fun and interactive because I actually get to measure my workout and change things to accomplish what I want

I also noticed that the HRM kept basically the same HR as my machine did (so that's good, they're on target). However, during my warm up my treadmill said I burned 87.8 calories and my HRM said that I burned 134. I'LL TAKE IT. --- treadmills aren't always accurate, and a programmed HRM (meaning your weight, age, height, etc. is already in there -- you do this during set up) is more accurate.

Anyways... that all goes to say that I LOVE MY HRM!! Its simple, functional, motivating, and is just what I needed to start making progress towards my goals.

I would definitely recommend getting a HRM watch if you have any fitness goals at all... its seriously worth it! Do your research and get one that fits your needs and your budget --- I SWEAR you wont regret it!

FAT - to - FEELIN' FAB FRIDAY!

Here it is!
(I missed transformation Tuesday so I made up my own catchy day/photo phrase --- because I'm cheesy like that)

It's great to get motivation from other people --- but when I see photos like this I seriously can't believe this   is   WAS me.

In the famous words of Bob Dylan --

 

 "FOR THE TIMES, THEY ARE A CHANGIN!"

 

 

If you can't say something nice.... RANT ALERT!

....isn't the ultimate goal in life to "BE HAPPY" ??

"If you're not happy with YOURSELF,  then how can you be happy with anyone else"

 

"Don't worry be happy"

 

 

 

"Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy"

 

 

This is not fair.

 

 

 

I'm seriously so angry right now! =(

....Even more, I am mad at myself for letting their words upset me.

This is not fair -- and I do not have to put up with it, nor do I have to feel bad for the things people say to me.

 

A wise woman once said "no one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

Its about time I start taking her advice!

 

It doesnt matter what you think. If I wanted your NEGATIVE opinion I would ask for it.

But I didn't ask, did I?

................................................NO. I certainly did not.

 

For the FIRST time in my life (since about 4th grade) I finally love myself. I am happy. I feel happy. I FEEL PROUD OF MYSELF --- and dangit, I FEEL GOOD.

 

I have an education, a great job that I love, I am finally making some money, I have a nice place to live and a nice car and I can afford nice things and to save money, I have some good friends, a good family, a fantastic/supportive boyfriend, and I feel good about the way that I look (specifically, physically) now more than I ever have in my entire life.

 

I feel so pretty sometimes (haha!) --- like when I look in the mirror I dont see a whale anymore. I can afford and fit into nice clothes. I can,  every most days, walk past a mirror and think to myself "wow -- you've come a long way! You look great! Look at your butt -- it actually has some shape! You've still got some work to do but girl look at you! Oh... is that a new skirt?!? Ooooo girl --- STRUT THAT!!"

 

(you think i'm joking..... but Im totally not...)

 

It makes me so mad that one persons comment can make all of those good feeling FLY OUT THE FREAKING WINDOW!! UGH!

 

.................................So, all that to tell you what happened to make me want to SCREAM:

 

I'm sitting at work today and this guy walks into my office and stares at me.

I said "hey! What's up?!"

He just looks at me with a concerned face and says "uh... are your parents around?

I said "no." <I've been on my own since I was 17 - supporting myself completely. My daddy died when I was 16 and my mom lives in a different state...>

He said "okay, well I am going to take their place and tell you that you're losing too much weight."

He just stared at me.

I said "oh... uh... well, actually, uhmmm..." <cool.. I love when I studder! Perfect timing - hahaha!>

 

My mind went blank and I wanted to SCREAM at him. I wanted to ask him why he thought that. He didn't know me. He didn't know how big -- and most importantly, UNHEALTHY --  that I had been for soooo many years. He didn't know about the mental and physical struggles I've had over the past however-many years ---- always being the "fat girl with the great personality" or the "smart chubby girl who sits in the front of the class."

All he knew was that I used to be bigger, and now he could see my facial structure and my collar bones (one of the most attractive body parts on a woman, in my opinion!!!).

Just because my collar bones show or becuase my fat doesnt fold over my pants anymore does NOT mean that I am "losing too much weight."

 

My mind, still filled with anger and shock, pulled itself together for a measley four seconds and I mustered up the words "....thank you for your opinion."

 

He continued to stare blankly, said "yeah," and backed out of my office.

 

DONE.

 

In a matter of 1 minute I went from being the girl that felt pretty -- because when I was leaving the house this morning, after putting on a black cotton dress, I  kissed my boyfriend goodbye and he said "you look very nice today" --- to feeling like I had no control in a situation in which someone could CRITICIZE me and make me feel like I had a problem         --- like being healthy and skinny was a PROBLEM that he felt like he needed to address!! WHAT!?!?!?

 

I pulled myself together, held my breath, and walked hastily to the bathroom --- where I sat down in the ugly green chair in the corner..............and started BALLING.

 

This isnt the first time that this has happened either. Crappy, right?! =(

 

I text a family member these two photos of me <see below> the other day and that person responded with "Dang! Looking good! Dont need to lose any more weight though"

Really......Did you HAVE to put that at the end?

You couldn't just be happy for me and tell me that I look good?

You felt the need to warn me and criticize me?

No thank you. I don't need to listen to that.

 

 

 

 

 

I got a facebook mesage from a different family member that said "I think you look fabulous, and i can totally relate to that exhilaration when you get back down to a size you thought you'd never see. I just want you to be healthy and not become obsessed with your image. You do not need to be any smaller. You'll look skeletal with your bone structure. You're a woman. Embrace your curves! Also, you said you'd never been a 6 as a teen or adult. so, yes, it scares me that you might be going too extreme."

 

Okay, I can understand your concern if I had dropped 100 pounds in a month for no reason by completely not eating or becoming anorexic or bulemic --- but losing 31 pounds and 3 dress sizes total over the course of 6 months is NOT a cause for concern. Really, I know you care and that you are only saying these things because of that... but I don't get it. I've never been this size before becuase I've always been fat -- I've always eaten too much and moved too little.

 

Still yet, these aren't the first remarks about my looks or my weight loss -- and I KNOW that, unfortunately, they are not the last.

 

People should know -- I am an educated, strong, smart, independent woman. I try not to make stupid decisions. I know how to make healthy choices. I know not to go all wacko and try to fit into a size 0 in one month. I KNOW for goodness sakes I KNOW!! 

 

I'm not saying that I am not going to make mistakes, because I will --- but what I am saying is that I LEAD MY OWN LIFE.

 

I AM, like everyone else in this world, TRYING TO MAKE MYSELF HAPPY -- AND IF THAT MEANS LOSING 31 POUNDS, 3 DRESS SIZES, and WORKING MY ASS OFF TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF THEN DAMNIT THATS WHAT I AM GOING TO DO - AND, MORE IMPORTANTLY, I DONT NEED YOUR NEGATIVE WORDS OR THOUGHTS WHEN I DO IT.

 

I am a grown woman -- and I feel pretty!

 

 

If you don't have something nice to say, then DONT SAY IT AT ALL -- BECAUSE (unless I ask for your honest opinion) I DONT WANT TO HEAR IT.

 

 

So, self:

Time to suck up these tears and forget about it.

 

Time to learn that people are always going to criticize and judge me for BOTH my good and bad choices.

 

Time to move on, and realize there are more important things in life than LETTING YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE CRAP FOR MAKING GOOD CHOICES!! UGHH!

 

Time to go back to my blog, instagram, facebook page, friends, family, and everyone else who knows what I've been through, what I want to accomplish (with my weight or anyyyything else) and read/listen to their positive thoughts and words.

 

Time to feel pretty again.

 

RANT OVER.

 

Drop it like its SQUAT!

30 day challenge, anyone?! Well I'm in! Here I gooooo!

instagram - paulablalock

@erin_morgan   &&   #erin_morgan

I'm BIG BONED!!!

Big Boned.

Thats what people (parents, friends, family, neighbors...everyone!) tell larger people when they complain about their weight or talk about getting skinny. It's all a way to make larger people feel better about themselves, their weight, and their body frame (in my experience, at least!) Thats what I was told my whole life.

I can't tell you how many times growing up that I heard "you're not fat.. if anything, you're chubby... you're a growing girl ...and you're big boned! You will never look good at a size 4 or size 6 or a size 8. You're just meant to be bigger. Maybe a 10 ... yes, you would be perfect at a size 10...." and then the conversation would trail off into something else... and I would be left wondering if I ever could be a size 4, 6, 8, or heck -- even if I would ever make it to a size 10!

I’ve been trying, off and on, for years to eat better and to take care of myself. Yo-Yo dieting has become quite the hobby over the past 8 or so years. I've always seen people that are so tall and super thin - thin being just the opposite of me. I was always jealous of their amazing metabolism and general lack of fat, not to mention the fact that they could basically eat whatever they wanted to and not have to worry about gaining weight. I, on the other hand, seemed to always gain 10 pounds after sniffing a cookie. Ha!

Was it my metabolism after all? Or what about my thyroid?! Of course! That had to be it! Issues with those two things could be the answer to why I was fat!

Turns out, my metabolism was probably quite normal, considering my activity level and weight. I even had my thyroid checked, making sure that it wasnt m body sabotoging itself and making me fat (funny, right?!) ....but guess what -- that came out normal too! In fact, I am pretty sure, at this point, I just felt like it was impossible for me to be thin, skinny, a size 10 or 8 or 6 or 4, or even healthy. 

.............................Well, there goes that excuse!

Just about every female in my family, extended too – is overweight, if not "obese". However, looking at old photos – they did not start out that way. In fact almost all of my relatives were slender and active in their younger days. All very skinng, active, and gosh, very beautiful -- so it’s not in my DNA either. Great.

.......................Excuse number two down the drain!

When I was a kid, after about 4th grade, I was never really ever skinny. I’m built like a mountain side, broad and curvy… (You like that one?) I’ve always had a very pronounced pear shape (smaller on top, larger on bottom), even when I was at my heaviest (210 - OUCH) and that led me to think that it was okay for me to be that big, because I just didn’t look THAT big. (haha, there I go again with the jokes!) People where floored when they would find out how much I weighed, I just happen to carry it better then someone else...right?

So then I told myself, well, I am just big boned.

Well, Ive been to the doctor a few times lately, and what I am beginning to realise is that NO, I am not big boned.  Not big --- just average. (For reference, I’m 5'7" tall with a wrist measurement of 6.5 inches.)

................................Adios excuse numero tres!!!

So if it’s not my thyroid or my DNA, nor I’m not big boned – what’s wrong with me? Why was I so big?

...........................Are you ready for the shocking answer?

I ate too much and I moved too little

Yep!!

..........Absolutely unbelievable, I know!

Who would have guessed that the secret to my success in weight loss would be logging my calories, moving my large behind, and taking phentermine to curb my appetite and habits of eating... a lot.... all the time??
Anyone with half a brain. No seriously.

So... this whole "big boned" business is all a lie? Well, it looks like it! I love this photo that really illustrate that your "big-ness" really isnt bones... its some muscle and a lot of fat (in my case) piled on top of those regular-size bones!

 

Lets get this straight, I am not "skinny" just yet -- and by no means do I have a "bangin' body"  either.... but HECK! THIS IS WHAT I CALL PROGRESS LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!

143.2 today and finally in a size 6!

Just bought two new pairs of jeans, one new pair of slacks, and a pair of slim-fit shorts from Gap =)

...........If I hit the 130s I believe I will cry!

So much for living up to everyones expectations of continuing to be "big boned" and never fitting into a size 10 (CHECK) or a size 8 (CHECK) or a size 6 (CHECK!!). I am so excited -- and I never thought this would happen. Well, it didnt just "happen," technically. I made it happen and I am so glad that I have!

I challenge you not to listen to other people. Do what you want and do what you can to make yourself happy.

Like the cheerios bee says "bee happy, bee healthy!" and dont listen to anyone who says that you are "big boned" and if you do listen, don't feel like you have to live up to that -- because, chances are, you have normal sized bones and you can be/look like whatever you want.... and let me stress that what you are/want to be/look like is ENTIRELY up to you.

 

Happy Monday!

Getting over my latest TRAINWRECK (DAY #1) .... and a little {WIW}

Talk about a trainwreck!!   

That's what I have been for the last, oooohh, month or so!

It all started about April 24th, when the A Brush with Kindness project kicked into hardcore gear at work. I was used to working 7-8 hour days, but immmediately was thrown into working an average of 10 hour days. This cut down my free time and unfortunately, working out was thrown on the backburner. Shame on me. I also decided that I wanted to take a semi-break from phen since I had heard that your body can only take it for so long before its effects lessened, which is something that I was already feeling!

So I'm sitting here, the end of April, working like a crazy woman, not exercising, and being hungry! Gosh! What a big fat excuse, huh?!

Anyways, for the next week I was kicked into high gear at work, I didn't eat really at all, I didn't drink water like I should, and I definitely wasn't going to the gym. The week of the Apr 29-May 3 I was up to working about 14 - 15 hours per day (some people do this... this IS NOT normal for me and, let me tell you, is a HUGE adjustment!!)
When I wasn't sleeping I was working, and when I was working I didn't have time to prepare food -- so I ate out. I had jimmy johns and chips and pizza and snacks and hotdogs and whatever else was "around" on the worksite or at home. I didn't want to cook. I didn't want to try to eat right. I was pooped and my body was only feeling worse because I had taken it from "healthy, active, and eating right" to "fast/processed food, sitting, and unhealthy. Not to mention the 2lb bag of M&Ms sitting on my living room table that I LITERALLY had to put away so I wouldn't eat them!

Talk about a TRAINWRECK!!
I was feeling GROSS!! I felt bloated and tired and I was worried everyday that if I hit the scale it would suuuurely say +5lbs or more! I knew what I was doing to my body, but didn't act to change it. What a dumb thing to be worried about ---  this is totally something that I have control over!

TAKE CONTROL, WOMAN!! GET IT TOGETHER, PAULA! YOU CAN DO THIS!! You're in a slump and you need to PULL YOURSELF OUT!! --- This is what I should have said to myself, rather than eating a few more chips and going to bed. Ugh!

The project and me working like a horse lasted until about May 10th. Then things settled back down....somewhat. I decided, becuase I was feeling disgusting, to call Fitness Together --- a personal training company. Hunter had bought me the "3 personal training sessions" at the Habitat Gala, and I knew it was time to put them to good use. I was tired of the two weeks of bad choices, feeling icky, etc... so I called them up and had my first (and then second) appointment.
They went really well -- I now know that I LOVE personal training sessions -- and the next day I was so sore I didnt know I could get out of bed. The one thing I definitely learned there was that someone else will make you PUSH your body harder than you ever would do alone at the gym. Having a personal trainer or a gym buddy is sooooo important, not only for motivation in general, but for inspiration to push yourself further and work harder to get the results you want!

That weekend was somewhat relaxing, but then the next week I was told that I would be interviewed for a full-time position at my work doing exactly what I currently do. Things have been really stressful at work lately, and I have mixed feelings about the hiring of a new volunteer person, but I decided to apply and interview for the job anyways. What could it hurt, right?
The interview went well and I got a second interview... so waiting the 6 days for that was a nightmare. The second interview went okay, if you were wondering -- Ill keep you updated on my job status as it comes (or, potentially, goes!)

Amidst all of my bad choices in food and basic lack of any schedule of exercise, the stress of catching up from the project, the stress of trying to land my job (permanently, anyway. Right now I am on contract that ends in August -- hello unemployed!) I knew it was time to get back on those tracks and get busy with the right choices!

I ordered Advocare's 10 day cleanse and decided that it had been about 25-30 days since I had taken Phen-- so I would start that again too. ***Most importantly, of course, all of this in addition to hitting the gym and eating clean! I received my package with the cleanse last night!***

I knew I had to make a change because I didnt want to let things get out of control. I had to stop that cycle. I ordered the cleanse, received it 2 days later and started the very next morning (TODAY!)
I had fallen back into the habit of grabbing chips or candy (or whatever, really) every single time I walked through the kitchen. I had to get back to my clean eating habits. That's why I decided to do this cleanse. Yes, it is restrictive (it is a cleanse!), but I needed some restriction to get my head on straight. I needed a plan to follow that didn't leave any wiggle room. And this 10 day cleanse (I hope) is going to do that for me.

So today, {Weigh In Wednesday}! 05/22/2013, I woke up, weighted myself, took my measurements, and started on the right foot with my Vitamin B12 pill (for metabolism!), my multivitamin, 2 vitamin C pills (for immune system!), a biotin pill (for healthy hair and nails!) my phentermine, and my first Advocare fiber drink! All was well, but if you don't drink that in a rapid time, it starts to gel? It was strange, but not bad, and I just added water to it and it went back to being drinkable again haha! I read reviews on the CITRUS flavor - they say it tasted worse than the peaches in cream but worked better - so I bought the citrus flavor. It reminded me of something familiar in taste and texture, but I still don't know what! I'll let you know if I remember soon!

Here is what the Advocare citrus fiber drink looks like:

MmmmMmmMmmMMMmm.... FIBER!

I'll be updating my blog daily with reports of measurements, what I experience/think of the cleanse, and of course, my weight!

Speaking of... today IS, after all, {WIW!}

What will my weight be by the end of my cleanse? Only time will tell!

And I will leave you with this....